Pray for local readers, not for a fat slob Yankees pitcher

Hackensack City Council candidate Richard L. Cerbo distributed fliers over the weekend, urging residents to vote in the Nov. 3 special election to fill a seat on the governing body. Cerbo is the son of Fred Cerbo, who was elected mayor of Hackensack in 1981. The elder Cerbo died in August 2012 at 87. The council meets tonight, starting at 6:30.

By VICTOR E. SASSON
EDITOR

Editor Martin Gottlieb of The Record has a good run going -- another boring front page with no local news that has most readers eyes rolling.

Today, Gottlieb features two of the paper's burned-out columnists on Page 1, and devotes the centerpiece to the release of a wealthy South Korean college student from Tenafly who had been "detained in North Korea since April" (A-1).

Who cares?

Sports Columnists Bob Klapisch treats Yankee pitcher CC Sabathia as if he is a favorite uncle, reporting the athlete is "deeply troubled and needs more than therapy; he needs our prayers."

The Yankees are paying this schlub $23 million a year.

I saw the 290-pound Sabathia on TV news Monday night, and his enormous belly made me wonder why no one had intervened long before he announced he is entering alcoholism rehab.

More rehab

Staff Writer Charles Stile devotes yet another column to Governor Christie's crippled campaign for the Republican presidential nomination next July, but the GOP bully needs more political rehab than even this pandering reporter can manage (A-1).

On A-2 today, the editors finally correct the LOL misspelling of Grange restaurant as "Grunge" on Sunday's Better Living front.

There's no telling how many readers showed up expecting to dumpster dive behind the Westwood restaurant.

Local news?

Three of the five stories on today's Local front are from Passaic County.

Two others involve the police shooting of a black man in Rutherford last year, and a Republican court case involving the Nov. 3 ballot (L-1).

The rest of the section includes Law & Order stories on L-2 and L-3.

For some reason, a story on the lack of a sewage-alert system for New Jersey waterways is buried on L-6, despite "an estimated 23 billion gallons of raw sewage and other pollutants pouring into ... rivers and bays each year."

I guess the editors worry more about CC Sabathia than public health.

The sewage story could have been illustrated with photos of water pollution, including turds, in contrast to all of the turds editors and columnists are trying to polish on the front page.