Are you tired of "Frank The Castrato," "Mother Hen," "Laughs A Lot," "Road Worrier" and the other nicknames I have given editors and reporters at The Record of Woodland Park?
Is "The fish stinks from the head down" a mouthful?
Please send me your suggestions for new nicknames that adequately describe the desperation, laziness and incompetence of most of the editors and managers of The Record, and the owners of North Jersey Media Group.
I'll publish submissions when I return from my break.
I think you could lose the nicknames altogether. If you remember, the whole nickname thing started with one of those thousand dollar a day consultants who was trying to liven up the newsroom atmosphere before the Atex prestige system went live (remember the Go Live T-shirts?). The Record has wasted more money on consultants and corporate mumbo jumbo (heck, it flushed enough moolah down the toilet on Continuous Improvement to buy Steven three mansions). I say just keep the blog incisive, enjoy the pasta in Italy (and let us know if you find the original original famous Ray's pizzeria), and focus on the paper's content and not the mannerisms or weight of the people running the show. Better you should ask people to keep an eye on the Record for you while you're away and send in their critiques rather than rack their brains thinking of what to insert between Deirdre and Sykes (how about Bahama Mama?).
ReplyDeleteFranky Panky Scandale
ReplyDeleteDeirdre "News? What's that?" Sykes
ReplyDeleteElisa "What's for Dessert?" Ung
ReplyDeleteJohn "The Desk Warrior" Cichowski
ReplyDeleteIf Mama Crass doesn't say it all....
ReplyDelete"Road Worrier" doesn't work, cause he couldn't give a shit about anything. He's more "Roadworn" than anything.
I liked when Burgos was still there. I called them "Frick and Frank."
Maybe: "Frickin' Frank."
Although he isn't as much of a frank as he is a weiner -- or weinie.
"Weinie" Scandale. Hmmmm....
I agree. Lose the nicknames. It diminishes the credibility of your blog.
ReplyDeleteDeirdre "Loafs A Lot" Sykes
ReplyDeleteTerrific suggestions. Thanks to all. I don't see how the nicknames diminish the credibility of the blog. Everything is as accurate as I can make it. The nicknames are an attempt to assess the editors in a way I could not when I was one of their slaves.
ReplyDeleteI stand my ground. Name calling only shows that you're still angry. Now it's time to move on and pity the poor souls that were left behind. No one there can be feeling good these days.
ReplyDeleteStephen "What? I Can't hear you, I have a cell phone in my ear" Borg
ReplyDeleteStephen "$3.65M Company Mortgage" Borg
ReplyDeleteStephen "McMansion" Borg
My daily critique of the paper will resume on Sept. 21.
ReplyDeletePlease keep the nicknames so those of us who are still beholden to those people can live vicariously through you.
ReplyDeleteBack Sept. 21? Ah, but the daily critique of your critiques appears neverending. How about Tim "Deirdre you ignorant slut" Nostrand (with apologies to Saturday Night Live).
ReplyDeleteThis comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
ReplyDeleteJennifer "Is that a bottle of wine in your pocket or are you happy to see me?" Borg
ReplyDeleteI agree with one of the many anonymi here that name-calling shows that you're still angry. And well you should be. That anger, however, is what fuels this incisive blog. If you downed a couple of figurative Prozacs before critiquing the paper, it would only be a matter of time before the buffoons who run the paper stopped reading it.
ReplyDeleteAnd how about the Daddy of Downsizing, Mac "The Knife" Borg?
ReplyDeleteAlthough this might be more pertinent to your food blog, I would suggest for Scandale a slight derivation of the stinky fish category: Frankie Fishsticks. This might make him seem like a member of the mob that couldn't write straight. On another note, although he isn't a member of the Record of Woodlawn Cemetery management team, he does keep them on their proverbial toenails: How about that Sultan of Scoop, Jerry "You Read It Here First" DeMarco?
ReplyDeleteI think it was his dim-witted son who was wielding the knife.
ReplyDeleteDoes anyone know of any staff member under the age of 45 who was ever involuntarily laid off since the Silver Spoons took over?
ReplyDeleteThe Silver Spoons. Excellent.
ReplyDelete