Hackensack news blackout returns

The Record's restaurant reviewer complains the cured salami she found in a dish of grilled mushrooms at a new place in Ridgefield Park "could have been more obvious."

Long-suffering Hackensack residents can be forgiven for thinking a Navy SEALs team that landed on Friday was intended to take out The Record's apathetic assignment desk.

City readers, who were hit by more than six weeks of intense coverage of Zisaville, will now have to endure police-blotter and gee-whiz items until next week's court hearing for suspended Police Chief Ken Zisa, a convicted felon.

Mountain fortress

In their Woodland Park redoubt, head Assignment Editor Deirdre Sykes; her deputy, Dan Sforza; and their clueless minions think so little of the newspaper's former home, the SEALs' visit to Paramus appeared on the Local front (L-1), while a photo of the helicopter at Hackensack High School was relegated to L-6.

Stories about municipal finances in Bogota and Cresskill appear in Local today, but Hackensack readers remain in the dark about the city's budget and tax rate.

There is so little town news Sykes and Sforza needed a big photo of a minor Ridgewood accident with "unknown injuries" and unidentified "parties" to fill out L-3.

Roof collapse

The big Hackensack news today -- besides the appearance of the SEALS -- is the partial collapse of a vacant building's roof (L-2).

North Jersey readers get a good pucking from Editor Marty Gottlieb, who thinks a sports columnist's drivel about hockey is Page 1 news.

The major front-page stories today are trend pieces about the homeless using hospital emergency rooms for shelter and food, and proposed pension-like payments to volunteer firefighters and rescue workers.

Go with the pros

Why hasn't the paper ever reported that many residents of Hackensack and other communities feel secure in knowing their  firefighters and rescue workers are professionals?

Thank God I don't have to live in a town where my life is entrusted to the care of well-intentioned volunteers -- one of the worst features of North Jersey's home-rule governments, despite high property taxes. 


Jersey swamp

An elaborate Jersey joke appears today in Better Living, where the cover story reports the opening of the state's  "own version of Jurassic Park" (BL-1).

One 90-foot dinosaur is visible from the Empire State Building, reinforcing New Yorkers' impression the Garden State is nothing more than a swamp.

Bad for your health

On Friday, Better Living carried a restaurant review that damned with faint praise an ambitious new place in Ridgefield Park.

Even though she gave 2 and a half stars to MK Valencia (Good to Excellent), Staff Writer Elisa Ung apparently was so underwhelmed by what she ate, only one food photo appears with the review -- and that's an artery clogging dessert (BL-18-19).

Given all the obesity, diabetes and heart disease among her readers, what's the point of Ung wasting money on four desserts? 

Vegetarian alert

And she wasn't even able to recommend a seafood dish, preferring to promote mystery steak and pork chops (cover photo).

When she discovered soppressata "buried" under a dish of grilled mushrooms, she complained the cured dry salami "could have been more obvious."

Like how? Shoved whole down her gaping maw?

Pussy chef

Also in Friday's Better Living tab, an item about Chef Anthony Bourdain corrects a post by Food Editor Susan Sherrill on the Second Helpings blog, which erred in reporting he grew up in Englewood.

Bourdain grew up in Leonia, but the pussy went to private school in Englewood (BL-22), as did Publisher Stephen A. Borg.

Breaking news: Warmer weather ahead

Image via Wikipedia

A map of halal restaurants in North Jersey that U.S. Navy Seals reportedly found in Osama bin Laden's compound in Abbottabad, Pakistan.

Did you hear the earth-shaking news? It's allergy season, The Record of Woodland Park reports in its lead story today. Tomorrow, the lead Page 1 story will look ahead to the arrival of summer.

It can't be too busy at the Bergen County Courthouse, if Staff Writer Kibret Markos had time to put together a detailed story with two sidebars on a nearly 20-year-old murder case (A-1). 

But he assumes readers have been following the story as closely as he has, so they have to turn to the continuation page to find out if the trial is over or not (A-6).

Osama bin Kelly

Pakistan's prime minister denies that any official was complicit in hiding Osama bin Laden (A-9).

Readers have yet to hear the same denial from Editor Francis Scandale, who seems to be protecting several incompetent reporters and columnists on his staff -- including John Brennan, Mike Kelly, John Cichowski and Bill Ervolino.

Adieu to Christie?

Many journalists are salivating over the possibility they'll able to lampoon Donald Trump, if he runs for president. 

Most New Jersey residents are hoping Governor Christie will follow Trump's lead, so the state can begin a healing process (A-10, L-1).

The big news from Hackensack today is the refiling of a sex-harassment suit in state court by a police officer who saw her claims dismissed by a federal judge (L-3).

Throwing vegetarians a bone

For several years, Better Living's carnivorous editors ran a single recipe for vegetarians on Mondays, and now the first full-fledged story quotes only those who eat meat occasionally (F-1). 

And during those years of token coverage, several vegetarians on the staff -- led by Travel Editor Jill Schensul -- must have been regarded as freaks, instead of as sources for a story on that lifestyle.

Kiss of death

Less than a month after Restaurant Reviewer Elisa Ung gushed about El Caney, the tiny Cuban takeout joint in Bergenfield is out of business. I saw a big "FOR RENT" sign on Monday.

Ung never explained why she devoted her entire Sunday restaurant column to this culinary pipsqueak or why she gave more ink to a takeout shack that had been featured a year earlier in the paper's own Marketplace column.

When I visited on April 22, El Caney was out of several menu items and had no whole fish. Portions were small.

Although the food was good, it didn't approach the quality of the many meals I enjoyed over the years at Migdalia's Cuban Cafe before the Bergenfield restaurant closed and the owner-chef moved to Miami.